When I left school and started working, I had the belief that I should live a little first then meet and marry my prince charming, stop working, have kids and live happily ever after. It’s what we learn from our
During my marriage, I went through the motions of how I thought a good wife and mother should be. I cooked the meals, I did homework, kept the house clean, drove kids to activities and I listened to my husband after his long day at work. I was a wife and mother. I was no longer that independent girl I had once been. Where had the once crazy, fun loving, spontaneous, confident, hardworking girl gone? Had she died and been scrubbed from the planet forever? Or was she just hiding until she could come back when it was her time to shine?
We can all get a little lost in our lives and how we think life should be. The day to day monotony of life creeps up on us and tells us we should be grateful for all we have. There were people much worse off than I ever was. But I knew there was more inside of me and it wasn’t until my husband left, that I realised it was my time.
I had so much to give and so much to share with the world.
My divorce forced me to grow up again and step into the woman I knew I could be. I will always be a mother but I will never just be a wife again. You see I lost my independence when I gave up work and moved overseas to follow my husband’s career. I lived in houses that never felt like home and I put up with a mediocre life to make someone else happy. I became a bit lazy when it came to finances and bill paying and left that responsibility to my husband.
My divorce put me on a road to self-discovery and gave me a clean slate, with all the wisdom of a mature woman, to become a better version of my old self. I rebuilt a better relationship with my children, I learned to be comfortable on my own again, I made new friends and I started a business. I believe I would never have accomplished half of what I have if I had still been married. I also run the home and look after my two amazing kids and 3 dogs. These days I am a happy, single, modern day mother and loving it. The 3 of us make decisions based on our needs now.
We do what we want when we want and we are loving it.
So, if you are going through a divorce and are feeling broken, just know that it gets better and you will get through it. You have the choice to learn from it and make a better life for yourself. One that is true to you. Use it as a lesson and not a punishment and take big strides ahead into the future knowing that life is what you make it.